The account of Jesus’ agony in the garden touched me the most as I studied the Gospel of Mark because I see a different persona of Jesus…an anxious Jesus who is feeling distraught and is in distress as his cruel death loomed ahead. He cries out, “Abba, Father, all things are possible to you. Take this cup away from me, but not what I will but what you will.”

           In every situation Jesus had shown himself a pillar of strength and a figure of authority even when his authority was questioned by the chief priests and elders (Mark 11:27). However, this particular passage on the agony clearly manifested his humanness. This passage resonates with me because Jesus’ feelings of deep sorrow are relatable to me on the occasions when I myself have felt anguish in challenging situations.

             One such instance in particular was when my dear mother slipped and fell on the wet floor in our home on Christmas Eve of 2019. She bled profusely and sustained injuries on both her lips and her upper two frontal teeth which required seven stiches as well as other bruises from the impact of her fall. I was crushed and fell on my knees as I was the one who mopped the floor and was responsible for this mishap. Despite the doctor’s assurance that her injuries would eventually heal, still fear and guilt gripped my heart every time I looked at her.

             This part of Mark’s Gospel also challenges me, because unlike Jesus who persevered and embraced the excruciating pain of the cross, accepting unfavourable incidences like that of mom’s fall are still relatively an uphill battle for me. However, with prayer and by reading and reflecting daily on the word of God, I have made progress in learning to accept the unexpected outcomes of life, imploring God to align my will to his gracious plan.  This is especially so in the light of the Covid 19 pandemic where uncertainties and challenges have become the norm. During my younger days my grandfather would often advise me to pray and ask God to give me courage to accept his will because his will is what is best for me and that ultimately it is he who is in charge. His wise advice holds true for me more now than ever before.